I have taken liberty combing through blogs that have relevance to my subject area. Some of them have all provided intriguing commentary on whether a single person can be an effective parent or not. I do not want to knock anyone for getting in the puddle and getting dirty at parenting. What I do have concerns with are the decisions made that leads to single parenting that often times bleeds over to ineffective parenting. Parenting in a two parent household is a huge challenge all by itself, even if you have two working middle class people doing it. If you are left holding the bag, then perhaps you have to go at parenting alone. Simply reading this narrative will cause a stir, because if you are a single parent nine times out of ten you are going say “I know I am a good parent.”
Even when we know that we can not do the job, we get caught up letting our personal pride mascara our plea to reach out for help and to even come true with ourselves. Your indecisiveness and self aggrandizing righteousness only stands to set the compass off its target just enough that over time you are so far from your mark that two worlds exist in your home. High school students in Alabama are struggling! The majority of these students do not begin struggling in high school; their antipathy for learning was potted long ago.
I have been in the presence of a few single parents over the past two weeks and they have basically tried to find some new growth treatment for their hair. They have been running their work stations as base stations for a dispatch operation on call for disruptive school aged children. The problems are school and home and tend to manifest in bunches. The fathers of these children get free passes. I am going to leave these young women’s integrity in tack and say the men possibly are non supporters,, and possibly provides moral support intermittently. I feel there is no humanly way for a single parent to give a child every thing he or she needs. The same as in a two parent household, some children are going to do well no matter the circumstances. The principle will also play itself out in a single parent household.
Good people do not necessarily make good parents. The same can be said that good friends do not make good lovers. There is no child that needs to enter the world if the parent (s) is/are not committed to hunker down and give the child everything warranted to be a success. Anyone that decides to do the insatiable clashing of the bodies exercise has to without question know that its outcome can have lasting effects on the success of a child. There is even more need for us to get the female teenagers out the parenting business. This has become a mystifying equation that is stunting the growth of children entering young adulthood.
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2 comments:
Very interesting blog David. I don't know how I have not logged onto your blog before. As I was reading your post I was thinking about my own parents and I am totally thankful that I lived in a two parent household but honestly my Mom did everything and Dad only stepped in when me and my brothers were being very difficult. That being said; I totally realize that if she had to work and be mom/dad and O lord possibly be dating and trying to have a life of her own, she could not have been as active a parent and raised SUCH great children!!! It seems that when people divorce the mom gets the kids and the dad sees them for funtimes and to help out financially and then of course some dads do nothing at all. I think, or rather I know, that you are right about stopping all these teenage moms. Don't vote for Palin, she doesn't believe in sex education nor condom distribution, which may explain why she has a pregnant teenage daughter who will marry in high school and probably divorce soon after and then be a single parent--what a cycle!!! Sorry about the political rant, it is on television so much these days that it seems to interject itself into all aspects of my life.
Anyway, yes teenage motherhood needs to stop and deadbeat dads need to stop being given a pass.
I agree that people do make bad decisions about sex that lead to horrible outcomes for their unbegotten children. I know quite a few single mothers and, while some of them are very responsible, some of them should never have had children in the first place and I fear for their child even if there was a male figure in the picture. I am certainly an advocate of sex education and easy access to birth control methods. While it can happen to anyone, its the uneducated and poor that an unplanned pregnancy and single parenthood can affect the most- and then that extends to the rest of society as well, who usually has to pick up the bill for raising the child.
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